my-coworker-treats-me-like-a-toddler

my coworker treats me like a toddler

by Alison Inexperienced on July 19, 2021

A reader writes:

I’ve been in a brand new job since March and obtain good suggestions from the corporate frequently. I’ve previous expertise in an identical function, in the identical trade for seven years, in addition to being in supervisory positions for 10 years earlier than I used to be laid off. Principally, administration thinks I’m doing an excellent job, and I’ve numerous expertise.

My downside is my coworker/peer. She has been with the corporate doing the identical job for almost a decade. She supplies numerous pointless private suggestions. She is aware of my background and that I’ve a number of expertise in my present function. I’ve spoken to her in regards to the problem many occasions.

Examples of her undesirable/unneeded recommendation: ensuring I put my chair below the convention room desk after conferences (advised me this after I pushed my chair below the desk), greet clients with a smile, wash my private cup out after use, learn how to use primary workplace tools, shut the door behind me, when to take lunch, in addition to to comply with sure steps that go in opposition to the coaching I acquired from administration. I promise you, I don’t should be advised to scrub my cup or push my chair, or when to take lunch, however the recommendation comes anyway. It’s mentioned in a condescending style and begins with “I do know I’m not your boss…”

She additionally affords poor customer support recommendation and will get upset/indignant after I ignore it. (For instance: Don’t be good to the distributors, it’s essential be demanding and pushy….don’t attempt to construct enterprise relationships….clients are by no means proper, and so forth.)

I believed the problem was dealt with a month in the past after we had a prolonged dialogue about it. It began once more simply the opposite day, and I simply don’t really feel I ought to have to go over this each month.

I have to work intently together with her, as she is a wealth of knowledge relating to our distributors and shoppers that isn’t in our system! Suggesting we put her info within the applications designed to carry the data has been met with resistance from her.

Am I going to must always take care of this? Sometimes I’d ignore it however I have to work together with her. How can I assist her perceive the distinction between useful and nuisance? She has offered me some fantastic useful vendor/shopper data, however the private recommendation is improper, horrible, and demeaning. Is she threatened by me?

Assist me nip this within the bud! She is embarrassing me in entrance of shoppers! There’s no HR group. It’s a small family-owned seven-person firm, and solely three of us will not be household.

I reply this query over at Inc. at present, the place I’m revisiting letters which were buried within the archives right here from years in the past (and typically updating/increasing my solutions to them). You may learn it right here.

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